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A Chocolate Calendar Without Chocolate


The Other Newspaper visited the last day of a very long, several weeks actually, atheistic course in saying or thinking something low-key. At the entrance I received a chocolate calendar without chocolate.

“You’re supposed to say or think something low-key when you open the door instead of stuffing yourself with chocolate.”

What if I think why on earth there’s no chocolate in a chocolate calendar?

“You are permitted to think that.”

This snotty atheist is telling me what to think and I find it bluntly ridiculous. But what almost makes me forget that Christianity is primarily about the lost ones, what gives me an uncontrollable desire to pull him in the nose is that he really believes he has good contact with me, as we stand here.

You think you have good contact with me as we stand here, right?


But what if I tell you I’m experiencing things in a different manner?

“Are you not experiencing how my, though a little boring, atheism, almost completely fills me with a glorious humanism like a huge carpet of low-key-ness that can be seen in my eyes?

You have a nice expression in your eyes.

“Thanks, and the same to you.”

You’re standing on my shoe.

“Oh, sorry!”

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Morten Hjerl-Hansen (born 15. June 1973) is a danish blogger born in Copenhagen, Denmark, Europe. I lived for the first 19 years of my life in a liberal-minded, literary and academic home in North Zealand. My mother is a psychiatrist and my father is a chemical engineer. I have two siblings. Throughout childhood, "I invented near-useless things almost every day" and told my siblings "fairy tales" where they themselves were the protagonists. In 1986, I visited Houston in the United States with my family on a stay that spanned three and a half months. I started programming in 1986 and made approx. 20 major projects until I "lost the ability" in 2018. Student from N. Zahles High School 1992. Ry College 1993. Read theology 1993-1994 in Aarhus. Read philosophy 1995-2000 in Linköping, Lund and Copenhagen. Worked as Java programmer 2000 and 2001. Participated in numerous poetry readings in Copenhagen 2002-2007. Got a psychosis in 2007 "which took about 10 years to recover". Married to Else Andersen in 2010 and resides in Asnaes, Denmark. Father in 2014. Has written The Other Newspaper daily in Danish and English daily since 2013.