But if you’re near a hospital you should not despair. The healthcare staff will immediately see the bottle next to you. They’re trained in this, as a matter of fact. They know you just wanted to see if you could swallow the coke before you detected the bubbles. They know you’re nuts.
(Most articles on The Other Newspaper are fictitious. The purpose of The Other Newspaper is to give the public a new, disturbing and humorous reflection of the way we consume news on traditional media and posts on the social media that make the recipient question whether the world needs to change and whether one can live online.)